The Heart Regulates the Hands

Over the past few months I have been sharing an acronym CAWA in the feature articles of my newsletter.We have covered C-Calmness and A-Attentiveness of the horse and the human. Plus I have shared training diaries of the seven horses I worked with this fall.

This month I will focus on W-Willingness for the human and next month we will talk about the horse. As we have been discussing these qualities we realize that not only do we want and need them in our horse in order to have a safe and successful ride, but we need to display these characteristics as much as the horse does. Horsemanship is a partnership and when both parties do their best to uphold their responsibilities the outcome is a learning experience where growth and progress is a continuing journey.

Let’s start by defining willingness:

It is relating to the will or power to choose
Intentional or deliberate choice
Ready to act voluntarily, without being forced or because of external pressure
Accept what asked to do by choice with eagerness or without reluctance
It is an enthusiasm to cooperate or comply
Prompt to act or respond not dragging the feet
Something offered or given freely and cheerfully
Being agreeable or favorable disposed in mind
Being prepared to act on your own accord

This fall I had a little black Welsh pony here named Lightening Bug, she was one of the most willing horses I have ever trained and so it was really effortless for me to be willing. One willing horse and one willing human equals two very happy partners. I was eager to get out and ride her everyday. Each session was pleasant, trouble-free, simple and straightforward. When things are going well it is not difficult to be willing. However when a challenging horse appears in our lives suddenly it is not so easy to be willing to do what it takes with that horse. But this is the time when we need more than ever to be willing to change.

I had another horse this fall who was quite the opposite of little Bugs, this mare was complicated, demanding, and problematic. I exerted every ounce of my energy, strength, and concentrated thinking every moment I was with her in an attempt to help her become calm and willing. She was very complex with numerous issues to resolve. The more I worked with her the more I had to be willing to change my own strategies, to think outside of the box, and to look at my own shortcomings. This horse pushed me to the very limits of my patience and the trial with her often exposed my true colors. This pressure triggered something totally unexpected; I became more willing to take the pressure off her. I offered her more time than I could afford. I gave her everything I had. I tried to be spontaneous with her. I observed her carefully, sensibly and judiciously. As I watched her I became more sympathetic and compassionate towards her. This insight caused me to quit trying to order her around against her will and instead try to bring the best out of her.

Each day I worked with her I had a plan before we started but I remained willing to change that plan accordingly. The best thing that I did was I always finished what I started with her no matter how many hours it took. She taught me we have to be willing to do what it takes to finish. I learned that even though my commitment to finish with her was clear, I could only do what I could and not what I couldn’t. I tried many new ideas but one idea kept returning to me; the heart regulates the hands. And so I needed to be willing to control my thoughts and heart feelings about this horse so that the feel I presented in my hands to her were something that she could respond to with willingness.

Are you willing to go the extra mile with your horse? Are you willing to make the necessary changes in you in order to help your horse become a more willing partner? Are you willing to take the time it takes, putting aside your goals and entertainment so that your horse can develop into the trustworthy horse that you desire? Are you willing to learn from your horse? If you are, I am willing to bet that the more willing you are to be the kind of horseman your horse needs you to be the more willing your horse will become. If you find yourself being unwilling to do what it takes with your horse because you are at the end of your rope, or you have simply run out of ideas remember we are here to support and encourage you. We may not have all the answers but we have a pretty good reputation and likelihood of getting you on the right track again.

In the middle of this holiday season of love and giving I hope we find ourselves willing to give more than we receive and that this spirit will continue with us throughout the year in all of our relationships including the ones we have with our wonderful horses who give us so much. If you are a horse lover you know what I am taking about.